BY COURTNEY PURDY, PSY.D.
Gratitude involves noticing the goodness in the world, but it doesn’t mean ignoring the challenges or difficult moments that everyone faces from time to time. In fact, gratitude helps ensure that, in the midst of life’s struggles, we don’t lose sight of the good. Connecting to gratitude has several benefits. It can help us feel more grounded and peaceful, strengthen our relationships by fostering connection and appreciation, and increase our sense of security in those relationships. Gratitude also promotes generosity and supports healthy, reciprocal interactions.
Unfortunately, positive emotions can be fleeting—they can slide off us like Teflon. Practicing gratitude helps us hold onto those positive emotions longer, celebrate the good in our lives that we might otherwise overlook, and revisit our “highlight reel.”
Research has found that gratitude can improve mood and reduce depressive symptoms. Studies also show that we tend to be more grateful for experiences than for material possessions.
One theory to explain this is that experiences are less likely to trigger social comparisons, which are known to steal joy. Experiences also tend to focus our attention on our own personal circumstances, expanding feelings of appreciation, happiness, and contentment.
When we experience gratitude, certain areas of the brain are activated, including the ventral and dorsal medial prefrontal cortex. These areas are involved in feelings of reward, morality, interpersonal bonding, positive social interactions, and the ability to empathize with others. Practicing gratitude can increase neurochemicals like dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin—chemicals that promote feelings of closeness, connection, and happiness. Moreover, gratitude has a cumulative effect: the more we practice it, the more the brain learns to focus on positive experiences. This is especially useful because humans are hardwired with a negativity bias—we tend to notice threats in our environment as a survival mechanism. When we focus too much on the negative, gratitude can help shift our attention to the positive, training the brain to spend more time on the “feel-good” moments and less on the things that bring us down. Research suggests that holding onto a feeling of gratitude for just 20 seconds can trigger positive structural changes in the brain.
Prompts to help you practice flexing your gratitude muscles:
- Identify three things you feel grateful for in your life. These can be based on the past, present, or future. No thing is too big or too small to appreciate, though being specific might help deepen your gratitude.
- Identify three things you take for granted but are thankful for. We all have things we take for granted. Reflect on what those are and consider which ones you value most.
- Identify three things you appreciate about yourself. Focus on qualities, actions, or characteristics that are meaningful to you.
- Identify three things you feel grateful for about your current experience. Be in the present moment. What can you appreciate about your experience right now? Consider your environment, the time you’re taking for your well-being, or even something as simple as the chair supporting you.
- Identify three people who have had a significant and positive impact on your life. These could be coaches, mentors, family members, or anyone else who has made a difference. Reflect on how they influenced your life for the better.
Courtney Purdy, Psy.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist specializing in Coping Skills, Relationship Issues and Anxiety. Areas of expertise include: Anger Management, Bisexual, Body Positivity, Depression, Family Conflict, Lesbian, LGBTQ+, Life Transitions, Mood Disorders, Peer Relationships, Personality Disorders, Self Esteem, Sleep or Insomnia, Stress, and Women’s Issues. To learn more about Dr. Purdy and to schedule a free 15 minute consultation, click here or call (561) 559-6371.
